NIGEL'S APPLE DUMPLINGS
Remember Nigel? He who watched over the February floods in Shrewsbury as the waters inched way up his plinth? We have an update – and a new mystery…
Nigel, really Hercules, an ancient statue that stands beside the River Severn in Deadgoodundies' home town, would make a great men's underwear model.
Now local history buffs have revealed a wonderful description of our muscular sculpture, highlighting biceps and buttocks like apple dumplings!
Hercules was moved from beside St Chad's church down by the water to, legend has it, spare the blushes of genteel ladies attending services. We think maybe one of them wrote about Nigel in these adoring terms: "… his muscles are things of a weird and wonderful fascination, more resembling subcutaneous apple dumplings than mere representations of gristle and sinew."
DGU partners Jane and Adam revisited the statue to take a fresh look, which revealed Hercules is not as they thought wearing a pouch of figleaves with a men's thong back - more a bottomless belt.
But their trip to see Nigel's dumplings raised another question. If you look closely, there are three balls in Hercules' right hand, surreptitiously behind his back. So far, we have no idea why but hopefully a historian will help?